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Longhorns

We’ve received a few requests to critique our team. What can we say about the oldest team in the league. Well we are champions again, probably for the 13th time in 20 years. Our team weight went down since Kuzek, Big O and Brent Kelly retired. We do miss Kuzek’s 280 Lbs grunt singles. We have a few members that are borderline alcoholics, one pothead, almost a rapist and Albo, we’re not sure what he is yet. We have a uncanning ability to play great baseball at 9am after a booze fest, but if that game starts after 12pm we are useless. We got tired of playing teams in the Sunburst because we always won. See prior sentence if you want to know why we lost. We always hang around to chirp teams after a DH but keep it classy. It feels nice to not be the most hated team in the FMBA. We also love the fact that everyone thinks the umps are on our side. Here’s a quick lesson for all teams in the FMBA. If you stop yelling at the umps and treating them like shit, they might start showing you respect. Yes we get mad at some calls but always laugh it off with them after the game. They’re good guys and used to play the game, I can probably say better than most players on other teams. That’s great wisdom and as they say respect your elders. We will outlast all teams in this league and you still have to knock us off our throne. Come and get BITCHES!!!!!!!!

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